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Chapter 4


"HULLO GEEZER ! HOW THE DEVIL ARE YE ?" bellowed Patsy to the King of the Green Monsters.
"PATSY, YE MEDDLING OLD FOOL ! I IS FINE, M’LOVELY. AND YOU ?" screamed the King.

And before you could say, this is a rum old do, Patsy and The King gave each other a good, old-fashioned Irish pub –hug, which is to say they sort of grabbed at each other, missed, but fell to the mud, more or less entwined and making nicely amiable noises. ...

Chapter 3
　
And so it was that Jay and Patsy went off together on their first trip outside of the bedroom.
And what a trip !
At Patsy’s suggestion, Jay sat in the first of the two seats, holding on grimly to the fur on Patsy’s neck, not knowing quite what to expect.
After all, the window in her room was only small and Patsy was big and it was a long drop to the garden below.
Except it wasn’t.

Did I mention that Scaremonsters can fly ? No ? How remiss ...

Chapter 2.


Where were we ? Oh, yes. Jay and Patsy had just met for the first time.
Ah, what I would have given to have been there, as a fly on the wall.
(Although Patsy would have seen me immediately and swatted me out of existence.)

All that I tell you now comes from the lips of Jay herself and the few fragments of memory which an old man such as I retain, after all these years.
Anyhoo… to continue.

There was Jay, snuggling her ...

The following tales were made up every night by me to send my daughter off to sleep snugly, when she was about five or six.
She recently asked me to commit them to print, so that she could read them to her two boys, Alex and Charlie.
And here they are............................................

The Life and Times of Patsy Scaremonster.

Chapter One


Once upon a bedroom, when boys were boys, girls were girls and packs of foxhounds roamed ...

The end of the road.
　
There were 10 or 12 of us; I can’t remember clearly now, after this time.
But, we were all riding race-prepped bikes and pumped full of adrenaline on leaving Assen.
And we needed to get to the Hook by 7.30pm.
Why ? Because England were playing Germany in a qualifier for the European Championship and most of us wanted to watch it before we boarded the ferry home.

And so began the most insane ride I’ve ever been on.
Once on the ...