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The Irish Tales

Er, a series of short stories about ireland ?

  1. The Life and Times of Patsy Scaremonster (6)

    Chapter Six

    (The Fox Who Stood and Thought.)


    One fine evening, when she was supposed to be tucked up in bed, Jay was wandering through the copse next to the gravel pit, talking nonsense to Patsy, whilst taking an occasional snuffle of her raggie and wondering if her absence was noticed at home.

    She was about to mention this to the Scaremonster, when Patsy halted abruptly and held up a hoof.
    "Look," she whispered and pointed at a large ...
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  2. The Life and Times of Patsy Scaremonster (5)


    Chapter 5


    Now. I think it’s time I explained to you the difference between "good" monsters and "bad" monsters.

    You must listen carefully, for what I am about to tell you could mean the difference between a good night’s sleep and..well, a not so good night’s sleep.

    A "bad" monster is, quite simply, a monster who is terribly ugly and smelly and blames little children for his uglyness and smellyness.
    ...
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  3. The Life and Times of Patsy Scaremonster (4)

    Chapter 4


    "HULLO GEEZER ! HOW THE DEVIL ARE YE ?" bellowed Patsy to the King of the Green Monsters.
    "PATSY, YE MEDDLING OLD FOOL ! I IS FINE, M’LOVELY. AND YOU ?" screamed the King.

    And before you could say, this is a rum old do, Patsy and The King gave each other a good, old-fashioned Irish pub –hug, which is to say they sort of grabbed at each other, missed, but fell to the mud, more or less entwined and making nicely amiable noises. ...
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  4. The Life and Times of Patsy Scaremonster (3)

    Chapter 3
     
    And so it was that Jay and Patsy went off together on their first trip outside of the bedroom.
    And what a trip !
    At Patsy’s suggestion, Jay sat in the first of the two seats, holding on grimly to the fur on Patsy’s neck, not knowing quite what to expect.
    After all, the window in her room was only small and Patsy was big and it was a long drop to the garden below.
    Except it wasn’t.

    Did I mention that Scaremonsters can fly ? No ? How remiss ...
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  5. The Life and Times of Patsy Scaremonster (2)

    Chapter 2.


    Where were we ? Oh, yes. Jay and Patsy had just met for the first time.
    Ah, what I would have given to have been there, as a fly on the wall.
    (Although Patsy would have seen me immediately and swatted me out of existence.)

    All that I tell you now comes from the lips of Jay herself and the few fragments of memory which an old man such as I retain, after all these years.
    Anyhoo… to continue.

    There was Jay, snuggling her
    ...
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